fourthwalled | Duplicity IC Inbox

[He takes the knife to the sink and drops it in, washing his hands before wiping them off on his pants. It's all to distract himself and to put some distance between the words coming out of his mouth and how he feels about them.]

Not long. Few months before I got here.

[ Scott heads to the sink behind Wilson - even touches the middle of his back. The purpose appears, at least, practical. He has blood all over his chest. He's still bleeding, actually. ]

I was already with Emma when we lost Jean. [ Near enough, anyway. ] I never stopped loving her and I certainly never got over it -- but it eventually gets easier to breathe.

[Her catches a growing hardness in his throat when the hand lands on his back, forcing it back down to steady himself.]

I've stopped trying to kill myself. So that's an improvement. [That's not to say he did a whole lot to try and keep from getting hurt, even still. He just stopped drinking drainer fluid and jumping into lion exhibits.] I'll get you a towel. And the first aid kit.

[He moves to go to the bathroom.]

[ He has more to say, but it can wait while Wade gets the first-aid kit. He just leans back and waits. Turns over words in his head, wonders if he's going to say anything else meaningful or let it go.

He wants to let it go.

That means he shouldn't, so when Wade comes back. ]

The last time I saw Logan before he came here, I tried really hard to get him to kill me. I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm still suicidal.

Are you? [He asks while sopping up the blood on Scott's chest with a towel. The current situation as it is, it is a good question.]

[ He uses one hand to get the first aid box and to decide if he's going to answer that. Offering a point of connection and understanding to Wade was one thing. Answering that feels like more than that.

Also, to answer it he has to really think about it. That's... not a thing he really wants to do. ]

I'm not trying to die. I'm pretty ticked off that no one on happy family island stays dead. I'm sure you can relate.

[ He has got to figure out who the shit he is without the x-men though. Cyclops doesn't work here and it doesn't feel like Scott exists anymore and - ]

This really isn't supposed to be about me, Wade.

You're the one who brought it up.

[Wade sets the bloodied towel on the counter. They'll have to clean up the entire place once they're done. Seeing as Scott left more than a little blood in his wake from the chair to the sink.]

If you want to keep talking about me, I'm not sure what the hell else to say about it. My life sucks and it always will. But then, I guess yours will too. It's just how our characters work. Writers love to shit on us and watch us squirm.

Edited 2022-03-15 22:54 (UTC)

Yeah, I brought it up because I'm pissed off that your life sucks and I'm trying to relate.

[ Dry and wry, he tosses one of those alcohol wipe packs to Wade. ] Open that for me. [ While he opens another one. ] Apparently my life stops sucking at some point, I get well adjusted and life's fine.

[He snatches it against his chest, then starts to tear it open before handing him the wipe when he's ready for it.]

And I'm sure there are going to be small parts of my life that aren't going to absolutely suck giant donkey balls but it always comes back around. Usually because of something I do, but--

[Shrug!]

Writers.

[ That he just rolls with that, without any real trouble says a lot about his life and how much weird is in it. ]

"What is, is." [ Askani thing. He misses Rachel. ] Let's go drink on the couch. I'll pet your head.

[He beams at that offer. Mainly the head petting part.] Okay! I'll get the drinks!

[ He rolls his eyes a little, but. The contact's good for both of them. Mostly Wade. He's noticed. This is a thing he can do, even if that beaming smile's a little too... high wattage.

go forth, wade. Scott's gonna go sit on the couch. ]

Duplicity IC Inbox

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CW: suicidal ideation.

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Re: CW: suicidal ideation.

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